Maybe this is it?

It’s that time of month again.  Those of you trying to conceive or have tried to conceive in the past know what I mean.  Either the period will appear, or it will finally be that lucky month.  The past several months, I have been extremely frazzled during this time.

I am officially two days late.  However, this has happened before because I am stressed so much.  I swear my paranoia is funding the pregnancy test companies!  This time I refuse to test unless I am a full week late.  Two days down and five to go!

My husband and I both want to conceive so badly.  We have tried the scrupulous timing method, having sex about every other day.  This month, however we took the “not trying to try” approach.  It almost killed me not planning out everything, but in the end it has been an overall less stressful month for us.

I am trying to keep the giddiness to a minimum.  The routine of getting hopeful and excited, only to be sent crashing down is getting old.  My nerves are frayed enough as is.  I don’t want to add more to the situation…which could lead to even more misleading thoughts about being pregnant.

I will keep you all updated.  Tomorrow I am thinking about doing a cool little bit of writing that I’m sure many mommy would be’s and preggers out there will appreciate.  A little humor based on my personal experience with discussion boards about pregnancy and trying to conceive.


Student Mommy

One of the things that concerns me a lot about becoming a young mother is the affect it will have on my school progress.  I’m a sophomore in college currently, studying for my B.S. in Psychology with a specialization in Christian Counseling.  I’m hoping to become a family and marriage therapist, which would be especially interesting given that I will spend most of my career around military families because of my husband’s career.

Now I know that going to college is not impossible while being a new parent.  My mother had me during her senior year of college.  She did take a semester off, but she was attending the traditional classroom college.  I however, do have the advantage of taking my courses online.  While I do feel like this will be more helpful, it could also become more difficult.

Online learning requires a lot of self-motivation which will be harder to muster when I have a new baby in the picture.  Also, most of the courses I take through Liberty University online are only eight weeks long, but packed with a full semester’s information.  It’s going to be a tough journey, but I know my friends and family will be there to support me and give me strength to accomplish it all.

If anyone else has gone through this, POSITIVE feedback would be much appreciated.  Negative comments are not welcome, as I have heard plenty of it.  I know all the negative aspects of having a child while still in school.  I would just like to hear about positive experiences.

Mommy Moment

Even though I am not yet a mommy of a bald two-legged child, I am a very proud mommy of two furry four-legged children.  Their crazy antics and endless need for attention and training keeps me on my toes.  I know it’s not the same as raising a child, but it has definitely been good preparation.  Unless I want my carpets ruined, I must sacrifice sleep for the puppy in the process of house training.  Also EVERYTHING must be out of reach unless it is to be eaten or chewed upon.

Diesel is my 2 year old golden retriever/Labrador mix (best guess).  One of the teachers at my high school found him with a litter of puppies abandoned on the side of the road.  We joke that he is invincible because he has survived so much.  When he was found with his littermates, they were so malnourished at only 3 months old that their gums were completely gray.  A few weeks after bringing him home, he suffered from parvovirus.  For those unfamiliar with it, very few survive this.  Although he sometimes gives me a lot of stress with his constant desire to roam, leading him to jump fences, break harnesses, and rip out stakes in the yard, he is still one of my most beloved pets ever.

Lucy is our newest addition.  We got her in September, and she will be six months old tomorrow!  She is a Jack Russel Terrier/Chihuahua mix.  This combo definitely gives her a lot of energy and spunk, but she is surprisingly content to cuddle in my lap most of the time.

Now this isn’t just some random post about my favorite little fur babies…although I have to admit I don’t need much of a reason to talk about them.  I am indeed a proud mamma to them!  I recently had a “proud mommy” moment when I took them to Petsmart yesterday for over an hour.  The thought of embarking on this journey made me cringe.

Lucy is one shot away from being fully vaccinated so she would have to ride in the cart, which for an energetic puppy craving attention from everyone in sight would be a task requiring my constant attention.  She is constantly trying to reach those who aren’t instantly drawn in by her cute appearance.

Diesel, because of his past abandonment had developed an intense fear of new people.  We had worked with him in a basic obedience class to socialize him, but I hadn’t taken him out in a crowd since the end of it in November.  He would almost always pull me in every direction in an attempt to avoid the people and carts…which I would be asking him to walk alongside!

Just as I expected, the trip nearly brought me to tears.  But the reason was very unexpected!  Lucy politely sat in the front of the cart while Diesel walked on a nice loose leash beside me.  He sat when I stopped and let people pet him…which was previously unheard of!  He even approached a few people on his own!  Everyone who stopped to give them affection was raving about how well-behaved my dogs were.  Needless to say, they left the store with many new toys and treats.  And I left the store with the glow of a “mommy” with soaring confidence!

New Year

I feel like starting this blog right before major holidays may have been unwise. I kept trying to make time for writing a new post, but since my husband and I traveled to be home with family, it was next to impossible!  The holidays were filled with so many emotions.  It was nice being around family, but it was also slightly bittersweet wishing that I had a baby in my arms. Here’s to hoping that the holidays this year will be filled with the joy of new motherhood!

Every time I saw baby items for sale and cute first Christmas ideas, my stomach did somersaults!  My heart was filled with warmth getting to hold my husband’s cousin who is just over a year old. I played with him for hours in the floor and held him when he got fussy later in the night.  My husband and I shared a glance and smile full of meaning as we stared at him sleeping in my lap.

We are both so ready and excited to experience parenting ourselves, that it makes it hard to be patient.  God always has the best timing and our best interests in mind, but sometimes I want to take things into my own hands. NOW feels like the right timing.  I want to smile as I walk back and forth in our home, soothing our baby to sleep and laugh as he/she starts becoming more active and mischievous.

For now, however, I am just trying to enjoy where I am now in life.  Each season has special meaning and lessons for us to absorb.  I am sure that the time I spend waiting to become a mother will be time that I can better prepare myself and learn as much as possible about the new journey of parenthood.

First Post!

Growing up, I never thought I would want any kids. I was quite content with animals, thank you.  But as I got older, my maternal instinct seemed to move into hyper drive. I married my high school sweetheart in July, 2011.  I’m now 19 and in my sophomore year of college, studying to become a marriage and family therapist.  My husband is 20 and a corpsman in the US Navy.  We live in a cozy apartment with our two dogs, Lucy and Diesel.

We are still in the newlywed bliss stage, but recently we have decided to add a two legged child to the mix. The few people we have even mentioned the subject to (without telling them that we are actually trying) have about the same response.  We are too young.  To us, however, it just seems like the natural next step.

We may be young newlyweds, but we have been together for over five years, which is sadly longer than most married couples are together ever.  We are both chasing our dreams, and while our two furry four legged children warm our hearts and fill our apartment with love, our lives our missing the love only a child can bring.

This is now month three of our attempts to get pregnant and we are both awaiting that positive test anxiously.  I know there are many others out there experiencing this same journey, and I want to share mine with others.  I by no means think I am anyone special, but I hope my story brings hope, joy, love, and inspiration to anyone who reads it.  So take this journey with me, through the trying, the success, and the mommyhood to come.